


What Happened In The Bathroom

by AllTimePhan73



Series: Jacksepticeye Ego One Shots [8]
Category: Video Blogging RPF, jacksepticeye
Genre: Panic Attacks, Suicide Attempt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-31
Updated: 2018-07-31
Packaged: 2019-06-16 14:08:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,614
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15438762
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AllTimePhan73/pseuds/AllTimePhan73
Summary: “No, no, no...” Chase mumbled, suddenly realising what was going on. Marvin was a few feet away from him, pressing his right hand into his left shoulder. Blood covered the top of his blue shirt. “Marv? Marv, I’m so sorry.”TW: Suicide attempt.





	What Happened In The Bathroom

**Author's Note:**

> Hey! I’d just like to say that you can send me prompts! You can comment them here or message me on Wattpad, Instagram, Twitter or Tumblr. My username is always AllTimePhan73 :)

_Can’t breathe. Can’t breathe. Can’t breathe._

He was hyperventilating. His head was light and he felt like he was on the verge of passing out but still he couldn’t regulate his breathing properly. One hand was wrapped around a gun and the other was on top of his chest, feeling it rise and fall at a rapid speed.

“Chase...” Marvin whispered, taking the tiniest step forward.

“Don’t come any closer or I’ll- I’ll shoot!” The man obviously wasn’t thinking straight as he moved the gun to his temple. It was cold, ironically soothing him since he was boiling hot. Tears were streaming down his face as he refused to meet Marvin’s gaze.

“Put the gun down...” The magician was keeping his voice as low as possible because he was afraid any sudden noise or movement would cause Chase to pull the trigger. “Please. This is not what you want. Think about what you’re doing.”

“I have. I can’t take it anymore! Just leave me to die!” 

“I can’t do that and you know that.”

“You can. The other egos are so much better than me.” 

“They are not. We are all equal.”

“That’s bullshit and you know it. Anti and Henrik get all the attention all the time so obviously they’re more important. I’m nothing. I’m a useless human being and a pathetic excuse for a father.”

Chase’s thumb ghosted over the trigger so Marvin’s breath hitched and his eyes widened. “That isn’t true.”

“It is. Why else would Stacy have left? I just wanted to be a good dad and- and-“ Marvin dared to take another step forward so Chase turned the gun to face him instead. “Get away from me! I don’t need your help!”

Marvin held out both of his hands in defence. “Please don’t do this. We can’t live without you.”

“You can.” Chase’s heart was beating loud inside his chest, so much so that it was getting harder to hear what the magician was saying.

“No, we can’t. You’re my best friend and I need you. You’re always there to cheer me up.”

“All I do is bring people down. If I shoot- if I- I do this, you’ll be free of my burden. You wouldn’t need to look after poor old Chase anymore. It’s better off this way for everyone.”

“No!” Marvin dived forward, just as Chase pulled the trigger. He pushed the gun from Chase’s hand as the shot rang out in the air. A scream was heard.

“No, no, no...” Chase mumbled, suddenly realising what was going on. Marvin was a few feet away from him, pressing his right hand into his left shoulder. Blood covered the top of his blue shirt. “Marv? Marv, I’m so sorry.”

“Get Henrik.” Marvin muttered between gritted teeth. His face was scrunched up in pain and suddenly Chase knew how serious everything was.

“I didn’t mean- I wanted-“

“Chase, shut up and just get Henrik!” Chase nodded and rushed out of the room, yelling for the doctor. His fear was evident in his shaky voice so Henrik was quick to come running. 

“Marvin... help him, please...” He grabbed the doctor’s arm and dragged him into the bathroom. Marvin looked extremely dazed and both of his arms had fallen limp against his sides. Chase watched as the doctor helped Marvin, his arms wrapped around his body as he trembled. It was his fault. He shot his best friend.

-

Chase was frowning as he looked at his best friend. Marvin was asleep but in a sitting position for the comfort of his shoulder Something wet fell down Chase’s cheek and onto the carpet. _When had he started crying?_ “I’m sorry,” He whispered, the only emotion enveloping his body being guilt. His mind was taunting him, telling him to search for his gun and do what he had intended on doing in the first place. _Do it. Do it. Do it._ “I didn’t mean to hurt you. I just-“ His hands were violently shaking and the tears had substantially picked up frequency.

 _Everyone is going to hate you. You need to escape._ Chase blinked and rubbed his eyes with his fists, deciding the voice in his head was right. He needed to escape. He found himself slowly backing up, not daring to remove his gaze from where it was fixed on Marvin.

As soon as he had left the room, he scrunched his eyes shut in attempt to recall what had happened in the bathroom. He couldn’t remember anyone taking the weapon after it fell to the ground so it must still have been there... _right_?

He had no idea when he had started to run but when he reached the bathroom he was out of breath. His eyes frantically scanned the room but he didn’t find anything.

“Chase?” A voice said but it was muffled. Chase’s ears began to ring and his head started to pound. He thread his bone-y hands into his greasy hair and screamed, not caring when his signature hat fell to the ground. “Chase, breathe... it’s okay.” A hand was placed on his shoulder and, at that point, Chase had completely lost his grip on reality so he saw it as a threat.

 _They’re going to hurt you._ Chase listened to his head and jerked out a clenched fist. Whoever it was yelped and cupped their (now bleeding) nose with one hand. The other man couldn’t even comprehend what was happening so he just fell to the floor and cried. _Cried. Cried. Cried. That’s all he had been doing lately. How weak. No wonder Stacy left him. He would have left him too._

He covered his face with his hands as his body shook. “I didn’t want to hurt anyone.” Chase mumbled. It took a moment for the other person to realise Chase wasn’t talking to him but himself. “I can’t do it. I want to give up. Why can’t I give up?”

The other sadly watched for a minute or so before deciding Henrik would probably know a better way to deal with the situation.

-

“He’s completely out of it.” Jackieboy Man muttered. Henrik nodded, bending down to meet Chase’s height. His mumbles had decreased in volume and had become pretty much inaudible.

“Chase... can you hear me?” Henrik’s voice was very soft because he knew any sudden movements or noises would just frighten the shaking man further. “It’s Henrik. I’m not going to hurt you; I just want to help you, alright?”

“Get away from me...” Chase whispered, shuffling backwards until he was pressed against the wall. “Just going to hurt you.”

“You won’t hurt me; even if you do, it will be okay. Just let me help you.” Chase rapidly shook his head and let out a loud sob as he buried his head into his knees. “We can watch a movie together and have some of JJ’s amazing hot chocolate. We don’t even need to talk about it just yet.” Henrik held out his hand to help Chase up but he refused. “Why not?”

“I deserve to die. I hurt people.”

“That isn’t true. Jackie’s okay, see?” Chase looked up to see Jackieboy Man smiling widely at him and holding out a thumbs up. He still had remnants of blood on his nose.

“Marvin..?”

“He’ll be okay too. If you come with us, you can see him. He should be waking up soon.”

“Hate me...” Chase’s use of minor sentences made him sound like a little kid. His vulnerable, crying state made him _look_ like a kid too.

“No, no one hates you. We’re just glad you’re okay. We’re glad Marvin’s shoulder got injured rather than your life being taken. We don’t want to lose you.”

“You don’t?” Chase looked up with wide eyes that were sparkling with tears and rimmed in red.

“No. Chase, you’re-“ Henrik was cut off as JJ entered the room and lightly tapped the doctor’s shoulder.

His hands then moved rapidly to sign, ' _Marvin is awake._ ' Henrik nodded before retracting his hand and standing up. “Chase, I need to go and check Marvin is okay. Jackie will stay with you or you can come with us.”

Rather reluctantly, Chase also got up and slowly followed his friends.

Marvin grinned widely as soon as he saw Chase. “You’re okay!” He exclaimed. Chase just nodded and refused to meet his gaze out of guilt.

“I’m sorry, Marv... I didn’t mean to hurt you...” Chase mumbled.

“I know. All I really have to say is I’m fucking glad you shot me.” Chase’s eyebrows furrowed as he scanned Marvin’s face for any signs of sarcasm. He didn’t find anything.

“What? Why would-“

“If you didn’t shoot me... you’d most likely be dead and I don’t think I’d ever get over that.”

“But I-I _hurt_ you.”

“I’d rather that than have to plan my best friend’s funeral.” Chase’s eyes filled with more tears. “Hey, hey... why are you crying?”

“I thought you’d hate me...” 

“I could never hate you, dude... come here.” Marvin held out the arm that wasn’t injured and wrapped it around Chase who was full on crying at that point.

“I love you, bro.” Chase’s voice was low but Marvin managed to hear it.

Marvin’s response was to hug his friend tighter and mumble, “I love you too.” 

Henrik cleared his throat, extremely guilty that he had to interrupt the precious moment. “This is cute and all... but I need to check up on Marvin.” He chuckled. Chase was very reluctant as he left the embrace because Marvin made him happier. If he had died... he’d never see Marvin or feel his hugs again... he couldn’t have that now, could he?


End file.
